A Fantasy

When the Ambassador or Escalopia returned home for lunch, his wife got a shock. He looked pale and his clothes were in a frightful state.
      'What has happened?' she asked. 'How did your clothes get into such a mess?'
      'A fire extinguisher, my dear,' answered the Ambassador drily. 'University students set the Embassy on fire this morning.'
      'Good heavens!' exclaimed his wife. 'And where were you at the time?'
      'I was in my office as usual,' answered the Ambassador. 'The fire broke out in the basement. I went down immediately, of course, and that fool, Horst, aimed a fire extinguisher at me. He thought I was on fire. I must definitely get that fellow posted.'
      The Ambassador's wife went on asking questions, when she suddenly noticed a big hole in her husband's hat.
  'And how can you explain that?' she asked.
      'Oh, that,' said the Ambassador. 'Someone fired a shot through my office window. Accurate, don't you think? Fortunately, I wasn't wearing it at the time. If I had been, I would not have been able to get home for lunch.'